5 Common Mistakes When Preparing for a New York Divorce


5 Common Mistakes When Preparing for a New York Divorce

Dissolving a marriage that does not bring joy and happiness anymore may not be the easiest task to realize, but if you are reading this guide, probably, you have no other options but get it done. To help you go through online divorce New York fast, we gathered the most popular mistakes New Yorkers make when they are seeking to terminate their marriage. Forewarned is forearmed, so keep the following things in mind to finish the process without losses and stress.

Having unrealistic expectations of your life after divorce

In the process of getting divorced in NY, many state residents fail to realize what their life will be after the process is over. You may find yourself in a tough financial situation, you may fail to find another house to live in after the divorce, or you may not find another school for your kids to attend once you move out from your spouse’s apartment. These and other obstacles can easily poison your life and make your recovery after divorce more difficult. Thus, you have to think about the ways you will solve these issues beforehand and have a plan ‘B’ that you will realize if your initial plan fails.

Failing to follow your attorney’s advice

The next one of the common divorce mistakes New Yorkers make is acting on their own without taking the advice of their attorney into account. Such a strategy is also wrong since it does not let your attorney shape the clear roadmap for you to realize in court: while they build a guide that you should follow, you are acting like you are the one who understands the process better. Doing so will contribute to losses in the end, e.g. property, kids custody, etc., since your partner may appear to be more thoughtful and astute.


Also, trying to act without your attorney’s opinion in mind, you are losing money since you are paying to a professional and not listening to them. If you believe that you can protect yourself on your own, it’s better to save money and not hire an attorney at all. Divorce lawyers are expensive, so think twice before hiring them.

Telling your kids wrong things about their other parent

If you share your hatred for your partner with your kids, you disservice yourself. Firstly, your kids will not respect you for bad-mouthing their other parent, and will hardly accept your position. Second, slandering your husband or wife is one of those divorce mistakes to avoid if you don’t want the court to consider you an unreliable person for child custody or just not like you enough to make a decision in your favor.


Here’s what you should not do if you don’t want to jeopardize your chances of winning the case:

  • asking your kids to tell you your spouse’s plans in court;
  • telling them their other parent cannot support them or does not want to take care of them after divorce;
  • tell your kids that the failure of your marriage is the complete fault of your husband;
  • causing obstacles for the other parent to communicate or see your kids.


Instead, to strengthen your chances of winning the marriage dissolution case, consider demonstrating to the judge your determination to cooperate with your spouse and your genuine will to terminate your marriage peacefully. Thus, the court will take your positive attitude into account before deciding on your case.

Sharing your divorce details on social media

The next thing you should avoid during the procedure of terminating your marriage is posting anything about it on social media. There are a few reasons for doing so:

  1. Posting on your Facebook about divorce creates attracts the attention you wouldn’t want to get. We bet you have not only true friends on your friends’ list, so sharing the details of your personal life is not necessary;
  2. Your posts can be used as evidence in the divorce case. Besides this, they can be proof of your income and things you spend money on, the demonstration of how you spend your free time, where you travel, etc. As a result, a judge may take them into account when deciding on spousal support or the amount of money you need to pay for your kids’ care;
  3. Finally, the usage of dating apps while you are in the process of divorce can harm your good name in the eyes of a judge. Until you are divorced and legally single, be discreet if you are dating other people. Turn off the tags feature on your accounts so that your friends could not link your profile to their pictures and check-ins: this is to make sure your life is kept private until the proceeding is finalized.

Refusing to find a common language with your husband

Finally, the last mistake you can make is refusing your husband’s offers to settle the disagreements you have. Your striving to postpone the filing process or standing your ground regarding any terms of spending time with your kids without the possibility of compromise makes you look immature and unreliable in court. Results are not hard to predict: such conduct will cause you to fail to win the case.